I have officially completed 29 years of life.
This makes today the beginning of my 30th year.
3 decades ago there was no internet.
3 decades ago the Berlin Wall was a thing.
3 decades ago Janet Jackson released Control.
Someone asked me the other day what I’d be doing next year.
The only thing I could say with any certainty was that I knew what I WOULDN'T be doing in a year.
29 things you won’t see me do this year...
(and a few of my favorite .gifs)
- Gone are the days of pets. Adopting a pet is just not in my cards.
- Devoting the sum of my life to someone else’s dream is done. There’s only time for me to build one castle - mine. And I prefer to have it house more than just me. (I want my castle to benefit way more people than just myself.)
- Partaking of excess does not sound like fun. Nope. Therefore, you won’t see me purchasing more than 3 pair of shoes. Minimalist wardrobe for the win!
- Never will you see me wear a one-piece again. My tummy is glorious, and covered in stretch marks and every single one of them deserves to see the sunshine.
- You won't see me pick up jogging. FUUUUUCK no. I’d prefer to keep my knees thank you very much. I’ll just walk. Walking is God's speed.
- Selling my cello might seem like a lucrative choice, but I won’t be able to bring myself to do it. Over my dead body. I refuse to choose lifestyle comfort over my true desires.
- I’m absolutely done with trying to make stuff work that just flat-out does not work.
- You won’t see me wearing that one dress I’ve always hated. I finally gave it away two weeks ago.
- You won’t see me refuse to delegate tasks. Asking for help is now my 2nd option.
- You won’t see me NOT fall in love. It’s time. I’m ready. If not an actual real life man, maybe I’ll finally fall in love with my TBD favorite author.
- Purchase furniture. There’s too much awesome furniture out there just waiting for a new home. Plus, I just don’t have space for anything else.
- I ain’t frontin’ I’m a basic bitch when it comes to food. I like my Prego pasta sauce and boxed wine. Those two things make my world go ‘round.
- “Okay, That’s fine.” shall henceforth be removed from my vocabulary. If it’s really and truly fine, there’s definitely a more creative and meaningful way to say it. If it’s in actuality not okay and fine - I won’t be saying it.
- Though I won’t be selling my cello, you still won’t see me play the cello as much as I did last year. Alas, Essential Tremor.
- You won’t see me spend more than 10 minutes on my hair every day. Get this. I don’t even own a hairbrush.
- I'm done avoiding using money as a tool for my advantage.
- You won’t see me avoid the dentist any longer. It’s time. Someone, make sure I’ve at least made an appointment in April.
- You won’t see me get schmarmy. I’ve just about had it with the douchebaggery that is the music industry. I can’t take it. I can smell that shit a mile away and I want no part of it.
- You won’t see me make a choice in which 34 year old Emily will not be considered. She’s a more important part of my life these days.
- You won’t see me sitting at a desk for longer than 2 hours. (See also: “I love my standing desk.”)
- There’s a time and a place for telling the truth. But this year you won’t see me telling it all the time. Sometimes I’ll just be very very silent instead.
- You won’t see me go another year without going to karaoke.
- You won’t see me make as many goals. I recognize how contradictory it is to state that in a list of 30 things I’m aiming to no longer do. But you’ve gotta start somewhere right?
- You won’t see me ignore my inner artist. She’s a demanding lady and needs some quality time on the regular.
- You won’t see me feeling shitty about myself. Victim-y mindsets are over. As bad as things might seem someday, I will still have choice. And that says a lot.
- I’m done denying that I have ESP. No joke. There have been too many ‘unexplainable & crazy’ coincidences involving communication for that denial to continue any longer.
- In fact, I’m done trying to explain or excuse the unexplainable.
- I'm done with coffee-less mornings.
- Finally, I can't make any promises about staying clothed. I have a distinct feeling that skinny dipping will be a theme this year.
There you have it.
*blows out candles*